Absence
by CrispyBread
Summary: A oneshot based on the last episode of the first season of the anime. Sebastian relents on his relationship with Ciel. Written with the poem Absence by Elizabeth Jennings. Please R&R. Thanks!


**Hey guys! I'm baaack! (not from the dead if that's what your thinking) **

**Anyway, i got inspiration to write this from a peom we did in Lit class a few months ago. Its called Absence by Elizabeth Jennings. Its awesome! When i read it, my mind immediately tot of Kuroshitsuji! so yah... Enjoy!**

**I do not own Kuroshitsuji or Absence. (and may i say that the second season of Kuroshitsuji in the anime sucks...)**

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I visited the place where we last met.  
Nothing was changed, the gardens were well-tended,  
_

I looked around. Everything was as the same as they had been; they were as they were supposed to be. Nothing was out of place. The sun was shining brightly, making the dew on the grass and leaves sparkle like tiny jewels. The birds sang their morning song ever so sweetly. It was peaceful.

But something was missing.

_The fountains sprayed their usual steady jet;  
There was no sign that anything had ended  
And nothing to instruct me to forget._

I surveyed the surroundings, wishing to find some disorder to distract my wandering mind. I refused to allow myself to remember that night.

My eyes strayed to that empty chair where you sat. Suddenly you were there, sitting cross-legged, sipping a cup of tea, that scornful look on your face. I blinked, and then you were gone. An illusion. That was all it was, an illusion.

_The thoughtless birds that shook out of the trees,  
Singing an ecstasy I could not share,_

They were mocking me. I was sure of it. Mocking my empty existence. I would never dare to admit, but those days when the mansion was filled with your presence, mixed with the laughter of the servants, made me wonder what an ugly demon like me was doing there.

But now the mansion is empty. Your scent has faded. The echoes of laughter are gone. They have been replaced with an agonizing silence. The mansion is now home to the only remainder of the Phantomhive household. The dwelling of a demon.

I wish it could have ended differently. I wish our contract had been different. When I first met you, all I wanted was your soul. Your alluring, enticing, delicate soul. I feel remorse now. I wish I didn't only have your soul, I want your whole. _  
_

_Played cunning in my thoughts. Surely in these  
Pleasures there could not be a pain to bear  
Or any discord shake the level breeze.  
_

"Carve the pain of my life into my soul," You had said.

"Yes, my Lord," Was my reply.

I hoped to be the perfect butler to the end. I obeyed every command that ever left your lips. But I could not fulfill your last wish. I had left a shard of your soul untouched, untainted by my unworthy hands. The rest of your soul I had defiled, causing a pain that mirrored the one you had endured through you short life. The untouched shard now dwelled in my being, a sweet yet painful reminder of you.

Like a white rose. _  
_

_It was because the place was just the same  
That made your absence seem a savage force,  
_

You did not make a sound. You did not feel any emotion. No sadness, nor loneliness. I knew you were going through pain. But you did not react. You died alone.

There was neither heaven nor hell for you, just an unending darkness. We both knew that. Yet you even wished to die in pain. Humans were intriguing creatures, but you were the most hard to decode. You sought my power, you paid the price. I had your soul, but why is it I still feel unsatisfied? Like a door left unclosed?

_For under all the gentleness there came  
An earthquake tremor: Fountain, birds and grass  
Were shaken by my thinking of your name._

My world was spinning. I had no control over it. It was my choice to take your life. I was a demon after all. I can never bring you back.

_Sebastian…_

I heard my name echo in the breeze. That was the name you had given me. The name I had responded to. That was the first name I had. I never had a name before. I never needed one. I was merely a demon that killed.

I looked at my hand. The contract seal was gone. Another reminder that you were gone, our contract done. What is the reason for my existence now? Before you first summoned me, my sole purpose in life was to kill. I enjoyed it tremendously, I still do. Yet now, I find killing does not fill my hunger.

The things of this world are so fragile. They will crumble in time. The mansion will turn to dust too someday. I will not be able to live forever either. But there is something that will never fade, something that, even after I am gone, will remain. My memory of you.

Suddenly my head was ringing, shaking, like an earthquake. Everything was reminding me of you. Everywhere I looked, every scent, was filled with you presence. The breeze that blew past shouted your name. Images of you flashed past my eyes. I saw every second spent with you.

Your deep blue eyes, your scorn, your smile.

Suddenly, it all stopped. Everything was back. The trees were trees. The flowers were flowers. The birds were birds. The breeze was light and cooling. All that was left was your name.

_Ciel Phantomhive…._

_~Owari~_

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**Tadaa! It was great right? Riiight? If so, please review! Your comments are appreciated greatly!**

**Oh and btw, ya'll probably don't need to know that **...**oops i said to much already*innocentlook*...One more thing before i go, if you ppl want to see the parody version of this****(writted by Ixyaru)**, please state so in your review. Its really, really, REALLY stupid and hilarious. Thank You!~

**Well see ya! :))))))))))))))))))))))**


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